Bad Medicine – internet style   Leave a comment

So a friend of mine said that he was addicted to the internet, but he felt this was a good thing. It allowed him to keep in touch with friends, to make new friends, to set up meeting old and new friends (he arranges cruises, so obviously he’s better at this than most), and so on.

So naturally, I had to write a song about this. And equally naturally, the melody would have to be “Bad Medicine”, because the internet is definitely about referring to the 80s.And so I present to you: “Bad medicine, internet style!” (With apologies to Bon Jovi)

I ain’t got a fever, got a permanent disease
And it’ll take more than WebMD to prescribe a remedy
And I got a T1 line but it isn’t what I need
I must get out of this chair to get this poison out of me
And I got all the symptoms, count in binary

First you read
(That’s what you get for checking this blog)
Then you bleed
(Another chatroom but it’s never enough)
On your knees
(That’s what you get for checking this blog)
And now this fool’s addicted ’cause I’m clicking the drugs

Woah-oh-oh
Your blog is like bad medicine
And bad medicine is what I need
Woah-oh-oh
Logging on to my bad medicine
There ain’t no website that can cure my disease

I don’t need no needle to be giving me a thrill
When I can watch a video of someone’s kitty acting shrill
I got a dirty down addiction that doesn’t leave a track
With my TOR and full encryption I am safe against your hacks
There ain’t no nurse around to stop me from replying back

[chorus]
First you read […]

I need a new subscription ’cause I’m running out of feeds
And I am powered through some pizza with a giant load of cheese
When you’re getting online you take what you can get
‘Cause if there’s a better internet, they haven’t found it yet!

[chorus]
Woah-oh-oh
Your blog […]

I must refresh, I must, I must refresh, I must, refresh
I must refresh it again
Wait for upload, wait for upload, hold on, I’m not done
One more site, cat pictures, come on
Alright, help me out now

[chorus]

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Posted 23/10/2014 by Emperor Norton II in Challenging myself

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